TEST DRIVE;

[relationshits]

rip we were trash the end

Comments

[incelligent]

[It'd be a lie to say that Simon hadn't been eyeing the cute girl browsing the store at the time, as he's familiar with most of the regulars by now. He'd usually have gone over and given her his now well-rehearsed and overly chipper spiel, but when she walked into the store he found himself feeling shy, so all he uttered was a faint, "Welcome in!"

He had waved to her with the meekness of a grade-schooler. How embarrassing.

She finally comes to the checkout counter, and Simon offers her a smile as he rings her up. He finally takes a good look at the actual game she's buying, and perks up, a tad surprised.]

Oh, wow!

[Despite his love for violence, he's not one to play games that have too many jumpscares. Those are bad for his anxiety.]

This one's pretty spooky.

Is it for you, or...?

[A friend? A boyfriend?

She looks a little too cute to be playing these sorts of games, but.

Simon isn't who he appears to be either.]

i know ml doesnt have trees smh just... rip

[incelligent]

[The whole abduction and head shaving thing may not have been great, not one bit, especially for someone who had been through it all before, but in all honesty, Simon hasn't been doing so badly for himself so far.

He has secured an alliance between the few Displaced he trusts and, as much as he hates to admit it, it's nice to live in a house full of people who can carry a normal conversation and speak in full sentences. Not to mention, this is the first time in his life that not one but an entire group of people were willing to play Chambers and Centaurs, and since he was the only one who knew the rules, he got to lead.]

Hey, newbie!

[A barked command. Look who missed being in charge.]

When we're on expeditions like this, it's important to keep your eyes up and ears open. Keep your body movin'. One false step, and you'll be goin' so slow, the next thing y'know-

[Simon steps backwards and onto a branch, the crack sharp.]

Everyone'll have up and left without ya.

[The wind rustles through the leaves of the trees around them, and Simon hears another sound, followed the movement of a shadow-]

LOOK OUT!

text; um will this lead 2 horny idk; this is ... really horrible

[incelligent]

[At about 8:25 PM, sometime between Simon's shift at the virtual reality retailer and his evening workout, he sends Chihiro and unsolicited photo of one of his flexed biceps, which has gotten markedly bigger since the first time they met. Thankfully for everyone involved, he's still clad in his ratty grey tank top which seems to fit rather snugly as of late. Those might be his boxers, though, um... At least the bottom half of the image has been cut off.]

Well, wouldja look at that! All that time I spent slavin' away at the gym finally paid off.

[As confident as he sounds, Simon would deeply uncomfortable had this image reached the wrong person. Gym gain thirst shots are for Chihiro and Chihiro only.]

I guess practice really does make (almost) perfect hehe lol 👅

How's your night goin' so far? You still up for the campaign on Saturday? It'll be fun! I'm plannin' something extra spoopy. 👻

text;

[incelligent]

mayday MAYDAY!!!!!!!!!!!! SOS 911

[Chihiro will receive a surprise image of Simon in what looks to be a changing room within the mall they both work at, clad in nothing but a red speedo. After almost a year of slaving tirelessly at the gym every single day, the poor, horrible boy is finally in search of a new swimsuit, as this will be the first time he doesn't wear a shirt straight into the pool. His face is the same color as the material that tiny piece of cloth is made out of, and unfortunately he is clutching his junk to save Chihiro's pure and unwashed eyeballs.]

It doesn't fit

[The only reason he is sending the image is because 1)this was one of the things that Chihiro had picked up when they went Big Manly Underpants shopping and 2)it would be easier than explaining wtf was going on.]

helP me PLEase i can't get out of it i thINK it's cutting off mY blOOd circULATION